I eat heart attacks (strawberyjam) wrote,
I eat heart attacks

you seem to love me now.

tennis like what.

partied in the parking lot of the movie theater.
drove a lot.
used chick fil a coupons
found transportation to dismemberment plan
watched the boys makes digereidisos.
saw colinconor!
watched lovely and amazing.
visited erik
i say today was eventful.

I dont want to get upset about it. but its hard. I cant help but get angry sometimes. I understand the priorities in your life but it hurts when you say youre doing one thing, then plans change and instead of calling and saying youre free you hang out with the people you see everyday. Its very fucking frustrating because i want to see you, and i rarely do for more than two hours or so ever so often. i want this to fix. because i love you.. and i wish that you would have fun with me. and tell me that im exhausting. oh rilo. i want those secret kisses. those little presents you would make, and the cards just to show you cared, and for you to draw hearts on my hand. and look at me.. and hug me whenever possible like you used to. i feel like im drowning you, because i want to take so much in.. and you just act like im a friend. i want to be everything you want and i feel really fucking far from that right now.

and its a horrible feeling.
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